Over the last four or five years, as I’ve talked with men about their experiences with divorce, there has been one subject that always inspires the greatest emotional response. In summary it is the perception many men have that the legal system is heavily biased against them. This bias is exemplified in a variety of ways; from child support being automatically deducted from a paycheck while paternity fraud complaints receive little more than a figurative dismissing shrug from the courts and legislators; to single fathers having to fight an uphill battle in the courts to prove their suitability as primary care-taker. And in most jurisdictions it requires nothing more than an accusation of domestic violence by a woman against a man to insure he spends a night in jail.
This is a problem limited not just to the U.S.! In conversations with other divorced men in Australia and the U.K it appears that the issue is wide spread and global in nature. I suppose that at least some of it stems from traditional views of women being the “weaker” sex and therefore in need of extra protection under the law or at least in the court room. While this author acknowledges that some differences remain in terms of pay differentials between men and women the current realities no longer justify the level of protection afforded women at the expense of men.
Am I advocating that men should not have to pay child support? . . . of course not and neither are the vast majority of men who pay. But all too often mother’s fail to report changes as required in order to continue to receive support they are no longer entitled to; in such cases what penalties does the woman face who has so defrauded her ex-husband? I know of at least one situation in which a man was defrauded by his ex into paying several months worth of child support because she intentionally withheld information from him pertinent to the issue. In essence this amounted to her stealing several thousand dollars from him . . . was there a penalty? jail time served? income garnished? No! In fact the gentleman in this situation was told if he wanted to recoup the money he should hire an attorney and go to small claims court! Yet the state had assisted in the collection of the defrauded amount without expense or cost to her via automatic income garnishment.
Talk with divorced men and these are the kinds of stories you will hear. Despite the media’s tendency to represent men as “Deadbeat Dad’s” who value their pocketbooks over their children, the truth is much different. The vast majority of men gladly take an active part in the up-bringing of their children; both financially and emotionally. The plain truth that needs to be addressed is that the Justice system in far too many divorce courts is anything BUT just or impartial.
It is time for a change.

Yes, it is time for a change. Unfortunately that change must come through our legislative bodies, and that means we have to have a politician that is willing to move forward on this issue. Unfortunately, I do not see those type of politicians very often. The political and social engines that protect this part of the system are well entrenched and entwined in the social psyche (We must protect the downtrodden, forgotten ex-wife!) and would take a long time to undo.
Russ