Good morning dudesndivorce.com readers! I hope you had a good weekend and are ready for the start of a new week.
If I may I would like to discuss some more about that very important communication skill – listening. In my previous post on this ( Are you listening to me? April 25, 2009 ) I wrote about not forming a response while your partner ( or anyone your having a conversation with, these skills are transferable to many facets of our lives ) is speaking. Today’s topics tie into that.
Listening nonjudgementally.
In essence this means holding off on making a decision about what is being said until all is said. Or, if you were a scientist, not formulating an hypothesis until all the data is in. In other words, while the other person is speaking, just listen. Attend to their words, their message, and their meaning.
What they have to say to you is so important to them that they are taking the time from their hectic schedule to say it to you. Return the favor and take the same time to listen. And after you’ve listened completely, then, and only then formulate your response.
But before you do take time for one more step,
Consider and value their opinions.
Take the time to actually evaluate what they are saying. Look at the issue from their perspective. Choose to give weight to their words, their opinion. If this is your wife, more than likely she is just has invested in this issue as you are, so take time to consider her words. If you have an otherwise healthy relationship, you both are invested in each others best interests, so she is concerned about the outcome just as you are.
More on communication later!
Russ
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