I had a chance to attend the Cardinals playoff game against the Dodgers last weekend; had some REALLY great seats! (15th row on the first base line) Just wish the Cards had been able to bring in a win that night. Let me tell you before the game got started the fans were on FIRE! Everyone seemed so energized and focused and intent on all of the fine nuances of their team and each player. When the game actually started everyone was on their feet cheering their boys on . . . The catcher couldn’t tie his shoelaces without the crowd going wild! It was a lot of fun being a part of that let me tell you!
But then along about the third inning things began to change; the boys from St. Louie were having problems bringing in the runs and the Dodgers were starting to put on a substantial lead. It seemed as if we just couldn’t catch a break! You could feel the change in the crowd as well . . . little set backs began to really upset people, little errors by the players elicited huge groans and a lot of people disconnected and either left early or were more involved in their side conversations than in what was going on down in the field.
Does any of this sound vaguely familiar? It sure did to me! I think it is a sign that I’ve been writing these posts for a long time when it seems that EVERYTHING reminds me of some life lesson about divorce or marriage. Call it an occupational hazard I guess.
Anyway – the parallel here is that when we first get married we are like that crowd at the very beginning of the game – enthusiastic, happy, cheering our mate on, appreciative of even the smallest thing, optimistic.
But then – a few “innings” into the “game” and we’ve had some set backs, some disappointments, this other person is not quite the all-star player that we’d hoped they would be. So what do we do? Well – we start letting small stuff really get to us, we over-react to minor errors and we begin to disengage. Now in a baseball game you can do that as a fan and it won’t effect the outcome of the game. But in a marriage we’re a player, we’re part of the team and those reactions can have a tremendous impact on the outcome of the marriage.
Now I realize that most of you reading this are divorced “dudes” and are not currently in a marriage; but chances are many of you will eventually find someone new and decide to give it another try. Seems like a good metaphor to keep in the back of your mind whenever that day should arrive. Pick a good team to belong to and then stay engaged and optimistic – even during those times when you seem to be striking out a lot more often than your knocking ‘em out of the park.
Hope this was helpful . . . and to all you Cards fans out there . . . there’s always next year!!
Be Well
Bill
